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Episode 018: How (and Why) to Stop Being a Helicopter Parent

Parenting Podcast (Archive)

18 Jun
helicopter parent

Helicopter parents are the cultural norm these days. They have good intentions and are trying to be the best parents they can be. The problem is that this style of parenting is not in the best interest of children because the underlying message is, “I don’t trust you. You cannot do things without my help.”

If we, as parents, want to raise kids who have the skills, the confidence, and the resilience to navigate the challenges of life, we must set aside our micromanaging tendencies and teach our kids to stand on their own two feet. This episode will teach you how (and why) to do that.

What you will learn:

  • The three universal struggles of helicopter parents (control, trust, perfectionism)
  • What each of us can and cannot control
  • Why micromanaging is not teaching, and what to do instead
  • Why helicopter parents are parenting from a place of fear (often subconsciously), and which fears are most likely to be leading the charge
  • The likely results of fear-based parenting
  • How to reframe your fears and your thinking to achieve different results
  • The three-step process to teach your child a new skill (TSD – tell, show, do)
  • How to get your child to listen and comply with a single request
  • Why you should never routinely do for your child what he is capable of doing for himself
  • How competence increases confidence

Books we reference:

  • Have a New Kid by Friday, by Dr. Kevin Leman

Quotes:

When you allow for your children to be competent, they will be competent. And if they fail? They learn how to do things differently next time. As their responsibilities increase, confidence in their competence increases. That is how children get ready to move out into the world as healthy, functioning members of society.

Dr. Kevin Leman

If you struggle with letting go of control or micromanaging, this episode will be particularly empowering and helpful for you. Listen in for all the details. You can listen right here or on iTunes, Google Play, Stitcher, and Spotify.

YOU ALSO MIGHT ENJOY:

  • Episode 008: You Might Be a Lawnmower Parent if…
  • Episode 005: Help! My Kids Won’t Listen!
  • Episode 003: Seasons of Parenting

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