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Episode 016: Raising a Strong-Willed Child (Without Losing Your Mind)

Parenting Podcast (Archive)

4 Jun
Raising a Strong-Willed Child Without Losing Your Mind

When I first started my blog back in 2014, I wrote a post called, Strong-Willed Children are a Blessing, Not a Curse, and it went crazy viral. It was my first, and probably only, claim to fame, and was republished all over the web in several different languages. That tells me that many people deal with the frustrations of raising highly determined kids.

In episode one, we told the story of our oldest child who was (and still is) the poster child for strong will. If you haven’t listened to that episode, I highly recommend you do because his “spirited” nature was the thing that ultimately led us to overhaul our parenting style. We wouldn’t be here doing this parenting podcast if it weren’t for that.

But guess what? He is not our only strong-willed (adult) child. We have five kids, and three of them have a crazy amount of stubborn persistence at all times and in all things. One is laid back about some things and as stubborn as a mule about others. Only one of five is generally chill.

I guess what I am trying to say is that Greg and I have some experience with raising strong-willed kids. With that experience, we have learned a thing or two about what to do and what to avoid like the plague. And also how to keep your sanity because these kids know how to push their parents’ buttons like a boss. Along with pushing buttons, however, they have an incredible amount of drive and potential that we, as parents, can help them harness.

What you will learn in this episode:

  1. Your kids’ strong-will is not your fault.
  2. Strong-willed kids need boundaries, even though they don’t want them.
  3. Strong-willed kids are often driven and highly perfectionistic, which means they are incredibly hard on themselves.
  4. Strong-willed kids will routinely invite you to engage in power struggles and will fight to the bitter end (even about stupid things). Don’t hop on that bandwagon.
  5. Strong-willed kids crave their parents’ trust.
  6. Strong-willed kids are natural leaders.
  7. Strong-willed kids are often HIGHLY competitive.
  8. Strong-willed kids thrive when they are permitted to be themselves.
  9. The things that make spirited kids difficult to raise are the same ones that make them into strong leaders and successful people.
  10. It is not our job as parents to break our kids’ strong wills, but to teach them how to put that gift to good use.

Listen in for all the details. You can listen right here or on iTunes, Google Play, Stitcher, and Spotify.

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