Why, hello there, friends. It’s been a little while since I have shown up in this space. Summer has been, well, somewhere between relaxing and crazy. OK, who am I kidding? It has been crazy all the way. I am crazy. My kids are crazy. We have no hope of relaxation when we spend a majority of our time together.
As my missionary son said in a recent letter to my husband and I on our anniversary, “After 21 years of this crazy family, the fact that you two are both still (somewhat) sane is a miracle! (And no, you’re not insane, but just a bit crazy. And that’s what I love about you two.)”
There you have it from one who left our wacky house just one year ago. We are a tiny step away from insane, which makes us incredibly endearing. Also, being away from our borderline insanity makes him miss it. There is hope for our family yet.
Aside from our natural silly, salty, sarcastic selves, we are gearing up for a host of changes around our home. We are moving one of our kids into the dorms in a few days because he is an actual adult who is ready to spread his wings. That is what he keeps telling me, anyway. There might be a teensy learning curve ahead of him, but we are all confident he will do just fine. (#fingerscrossed)
My two youngest kids will also be starting a new school next week. For reasons I will not get into now, we made the difficult decision to leave the charter school that has been our second home for the past nine years and enroll our kids in our neighborhood public schools. It will be a massive change, but we are praying the transition goes smoothly.
The winds of change are blowing furiously, and we are holding on for the ride.
As if we did not have enough on our plate by saying goodbye to one kid (ahem…I mean adult) and uprooting another two, we have been dealing with some scary medical issues with our college-bound son that are throwing us for a loop. (Think baseball-sized mass that is *probably* nothing serious…but we are still waiting on the test results.)
Can I say terrible timing?!?
When we discovered that mass the other day, I was terrified. My mind instantly went to cancer because that is what unexplained lumps the size of a baseball are, right? And cancer is no joke.
But you know what? I’m alright now. I can think straight. I can function well. I can tackle everything on my mile-long to-do list without dwelling on all the what-ifs. I am as calm as a summer’s day. (Though summer days in my house are not exactly calm. I guess I mean calm like a summer’s day for people who do not have children at home.)
I attribute my peace of mind to a whole lot of prayer because I cannot rationally say that everything will go off without a hitch. I cannot tell you this boy will leave for college in SEVEN DAYS and be able to dive into life on his own with no issues or setbacks. I have no idea what treatment will be required, though surgery seems likely.
But somehow, through the grace of God, I know in my soul that everything will work out exactly how it should. This situation is 100% out of my hands and into God’s. The peace I feel tells me that He’s got this, which means I don’t have to worry. Worrying would, at this point, be a waste of much-needed energy.
I don’t know what the next few days and weeks will look like, but it will be OK. We are taking it one step and one day at a time. That means we are shopping for school supplies and dorm essentials between medical tests and doctor’s appointments. It means life is moving ahead and we are going with it, uncertainty and all.
We are expecting the test results any day now. Soon, we will know what we are dealing with, which will make it much easier to plan. But I needed to write my thoughts before we see the end game because, quite honestly, how things turn out is not what matters right this moment.
The important thing at this stage is that I have learned it is possible to have peace in the midst of a raging storm. Not just a little peace, but complete peace. And it is all because of Him.
Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.