Here I sit, tissues and hand sanitizer at the ready, thanks to an inconsiderate virus that my dear son shared with me. Illness has little concern for the fact that school gets out for the summer next week, and it is my busy season of concerts, festivals, awards ceremonies, and parties. Ain’t nobody got time for that! But the kids are all at school for the first time in what seems like forever, and I must push through the brain fog to write.
My thoughts are all over the place these days. Right now, I am lamenting the tragic, albeit temporary, loss of my taste buds (dumb virus), interspersed with feeling like life is passing me by. How is it possible that another one of my kids is graduating from high school in a few short days? Didn’t I just take this photo yesterday?
Or maybe I’m thinking of this one:
When did he get so tall? It happened oh, so fast.
I did this whole graduation thing last year, so I know the drill. I know it will be alright. He is excited and READY to move on to other things that are necessary for his personal growth, and I am prepared to play a supporting role in that process.
But it still brings up so many memories and emotions. It still causes me to reflect on what has been, what IS, and what will be. The ever-changing rhythm of life is pounding in my ears.
If I have learned anything in my motherhood journey, it is that there is always something good on the horizon. Yes, there are stress and worry. There are moments when all I can do is pray because control is elusive. There are times when I wonder if I have done enough – if it is possible to do enough when there is ALWAYS more to be done.
There are ups and downs galore, but joy is always in the cracks and crevices of the daily roller-coaster, waiting to be discovered and savored. Whether or not we see it is up to you and me.
Yes, time passes like a thief in the night. The infant you hold in your arms will one day walk across the stage and accept his diploma, and you will wonder where the time went, just like I am doing now.
I will not tell you to enjoy every moment of the journey because I don’t believe that is possible. I will not ask you to count the summers until your babies leave home because that puts way too much pressure on your shoulders to curate an impossible dream of perfection.
But I will tell you to look for joy – to seize the serendipitous moments that come and go so quickly and almost imperceptibly. Whether that looks like dancing in the kitchen, playing a killer game of UNO, or having a hilarious, impromptu conversation with your teenager at midnight – drink deeply of the magic in the mundane – the beauty in the ordinary.
Life is not made up of big decisions, grand events, or perfect summers. It is composed of small interactions and little choices that don’t seem to matter until they add up to a lifetime.
Knowing that, I am trying to put my phone down a little more often and pay attention to the people in my home. I am not always the best at that if I am being honest, but time is ticking away. I need my hands free and my eyes up so I can take in all the nuances of this fleeting stage of life, even the ones that drive me crazy. (Because, let’s be honest, there are plenty of those! #teenagersaredramatic)
Will you join me? Together, let’s build a life that we love – one joyful moment at a time.